The Balance [Max]

[Max Kameren]

“’Sides, they’ll have to get through me first. Max Kameren: rune-slasher extraordinaire.”

"Not funny Max. Can you please not put yourself in more danger? You don't need to do anything heroric for me to like you more. I just need you alive. Please." She leaned into him, hiding her face in his chest and breathing in his scent, letting it comfort her.

Max took a deep breath as if to prove his point, her head rising and falling with his chest. “I’m alive and well. And believe it or not I don’t go looking for danger, it tends to find me on its own.” He half-smiled, leaning down and kissing Rowena on top of her head. His kiss lingered as he breathed in her scent, contemplating her words as she continued.

"I'm scared it's coming for us. We, well you, ruined what it was doing right? I felt it's anger," Max saw her point and he nodded, holding her tighter as he felt her anxiety grow. "And I'm not naive Max. Look at everything it's done already. I'm not giving up, I'm going to fight, but I'm also realistic. I'm not going to make it out of this alive..."

She pulled back to meet his gaze and without a proper reply Max leaned in and kissed her again. He tried to use his confidence to support her in his aura. There wasn’t much he could say that she would believe, but Max had a feeling they would make it through. He wasn’t totally naïve; he knew it would be difficult, that they likely wouldn’t weather the war without a scratch, but now that Rowena was in his life he couldn’t imagine it without her. Or at least, he didn’t want to.

"You really would be better off without me you know. Maybe if you left me, created some distance, then it wouldn't come after you too. I don't want you to get hurt Max... but I'm not strong enough... or maybe I'm just too selfish to leave you."

Max stopped and pushed her away to arm’s length, arching a skeptical brow at her. He smiled wryly. “So, are you breaking up with me? It sounds like you’re breaking up with me. Look,” Max sat back down on the blanket, taking Rowena’s hand and leading her to do the same, “Ro, I’m not going anywhere. Slashing that rune? That was my decision, and I stand by it. I’d do it again.” He shrugged.

“Danger with you is better than safety without you. You’re not getting rid of me. Whoever they are, they want us separated. They want you alone. I’m not letting them.” It wasn't a suggestion, it was a statement. He was here to stay.

[Rowena Jones]

Max stopped and pushed her away to arm’s length, arching a skeptical brow as he smiled wryly. “So, are you breaking up with me? It sounds like you’re breaking up with me.” He sat back down on the blanket, taking Rowena’s hand and she followed obligingly, sitting next to him even as she shook her head to rid him of any idea that she was breaking up with him.

“Look, Ro, I’m not going anywhere. Slashing that rune? That was my decision, and I stand by it. I’d do it again.” Max shrugged and Rowena bit her lip, looking at their joined hands as she thought. Her mother had died because of that decision. A Hogwarts professor had been seriously injured, was even now in Long Term care at Mungos. And there was a missing boy from Hogsmeade that had to be related. It was awful to think about but they had to think about what could have happened if Max hadn't intervened. They still didn't know what all her Energy had been used for, but it would have killed her so surely it had been something big, something that could have resulted in the deaths of many more. Rowena decided not to say anything else on the subject. The decision had been made, for better or for worse, much like what she had done with her father. Now, they could only move forward. And if Max wasn't going to leave, then they would continue to do it together. Or was it start to do it together... they really had done a crap job of it so far. 

“Danger with you is better than safety without you. You’re not getting rid of me. Whoever they are, they want us separated. They want you alone. I’m not letting them.”

There was a definitive crack in the already fragile walls she had put up around her heart at those words. She looked at Max, eyes shining with emotion. There was very little she could say to that, so instead she let her emotions do the talking, letting him feel how much that sentiment meant to her at a time where everything else was confusion. She shifted onto her knees and leaned over so she could properly kiss him, no longer shy or full of secrets. For the first time in what felt like forever, she felt the smallest glimmer of hope, if not that she'd make it out of this alive, that at least maybe they could have what they'd shared before all the death and secrets had started piling up. 

When she finally pulled away, a hint of her old self was present in the playful grin that tugged at the edges of her lips. "So I'm all out of secrets. You done too? Or is there anything else you're keeping from me that I should know?" They might as well joke about it, she reasoned. They had to find a little joy in the darkness that their lives had become and really it had been so stupid on both their parts to keep those secrets in the first place. She wondered if anything would have been different if she'd been open from the start, but then shook her head lightly. There was no point looking backwards, only forwards. 

[Max Kameren]

A rush of joy went through Max radiating off of Rowena as she turned to him and he smiled. It wasn’t just sentiment, he meant every word; if they wanted Rowena Max would be there every step of the way, no matter the cost. She kneeled to kiss him and for a moment it was electric, like the first time they’d properly kissed. For a brief moment they were free from the weight of their secrets and battles. For now it was just them, their reality could wait.

When she finally pulled away, a hint of her old self was present in the playful grin that tugged at the edges of her lips. "So I'm all out of secrets. You done too? Or is there anything else you're keeping from me that I should know?"

What constituted a secret? There was nothing explicitly relating to their relationship Max hadn’t told Rowena, but there were a few nagging awkward conversations down the road he would have to think about. He always took it way too fast, too much too soon. With Rowena he’d wanted to take it slow and do it right, but with the distractions of coming conflict he’d lost track again and here he was: in love, but nervous. Max had been bad at relationships before, and though he didn’t usually think it necessary to talk about his past with Rowena it felt pertinent. This time felt different, more mutual, but was it? Or were they just being united by their shared trauma? A week ago Rowena was pulling away, and now they felt back in their same rhythm. What did that mean?

“Nothing.” He wasn’t keeping his past engagements from her, not really. Eventually they’d talk, but even with all this madness they’d still been only dating a month. They could cross that bridge when they got to it. Max smiled and closed the small space between them to kiss her, pulling her in for a snog despite the public setting.

[Rowena Jones]

“Nothing.”

Rowena smiled brilliantly at him, happy that finally they'd cleared the air, and let him pull her closer for a snog. It was a nice feeling, knowing that they were back in a good place, able to trust each other a little better and she realised how stupid it had been to not confide in him in the first place. It didn't seem to matter that they'd been together for such a short time, being with Max felt right and natural. Just because other people might think things were moving quickly between them didn't actually mean that it was wrong. They fit together and Rowena was going to enjoy the bit of happiness she was given amongst all the tragedy that was omnipresent in her life.

When they finally parted, Rowena's cheeks were flushed and she giggled feeling like a teenager again. "Are you hungry?" she asked, turning to find her bag, "I brought a small picnic." Rowena pulled out a couple of sandwiches, a salad, a quiche, a bag of crisps, some scones, some fruit, some mixed nuts, a few slices of cake and a bottle of raspberry lemonade. She set it all out along with two plates and cups, before biting her lip in worry. "Is that enough?" she asked?

She put some food on her plate and ate her lunch, chatting to her boyfriend, enjoying a few hours of peace before she had to return to the reality of funeral planning.